|blah blah more random fiction/i never finish this shit
||[Sep. 8th, 2005|11:04 am]
|||||Aphex Twin - Windowlicker||]|
We had trouble. The world was closing in and nothing could stop it. We would have to get real jobs. All of us. It seemed like a long summer was ending. Time to say goodbye.
Oh well. Oh well.
I wondered out loud, is this how dreamers die?
Boris was laughing. He was always laughing then. There were things to laugh about. It seemed that way at least.
He would say later his mind was just trying to catch up. It wouldn’t take long.
The gestation period varies. So does the mileage.
Boris is always crying now. I give him my shoulder when I’m not laughing.
You could see the seeds then if you knew where to look, but I didn’t. That’s just the way I was then.
I miss it.
I miss everything.
The last time I had sex I cried. She was pretty enough, but when she put her arms around me I couldn’t stop. She reminded me of my mother. I came three times that day.
I don’t know what that means.
When I was a kid I thought I knew everything. Life was waiting for me. That’s what I thought.
Ignorance really is its own kind of bliss. I was happy. Free.
I like to pretend now. I play games to pass the time. I count pencils. Spin in my chair. I have an office now. A big one.
There’s even a tie on my neck.
I wonder who I am now. I’m not me.